Today is my last "free" Saturday, I suppose. Will and Carly will be finished with finals this coming week and will be heading home. I'm not sure when Sam will be visiting, but I hope some time soon. I haven't seen him since Christmas and I'd like to wrap my arms around him.
This school year has gone extremely fast for me. I think good living causes that to happen, and I've been doing some excellent living. But, I'm ready to close down the year and settle into my summer routine, which includes a full fridge (requested by Will and Carly), cooking (required by Will and Carly), and, of course, the usuals like walking, sleeping in a bit, reading trash, and morning crossword puzzles. I'm also hoping to take a few quick trips this summer, spending time with friends and family, maybe seeing a few things I haven't seen before.
Usually by the time I'm in my summer routine, it's time to get back into the school routine, but maybe that's just part of the routine, too. (I bet not many people can use the word routine three times in one sentence.)
Anyway. . . I don't have too much going on in this very moment so I guess that's a good thing. I've talked to all three of the kids, walked the dog, loved on the cats, read, eaten, watched some tv. . . I continue to be amazed at the goodness of life.
My grandmother died four years ago this past week and I couldn't help but think of her and smile. I certainly didn't love and care for her the way my own kids love theirs'. The dark part of her could be unpredictable and jealous and maybe even a little bit mean. She wasn't brave enough to love deep and hard because she was so very busy protecting her heart. But she managed to somehow raise my mother so there had to be something there, right? In a very weird way, her end of life was the beginning of my own. Watching her die, pondering her life, made me start the search for my own. Who would have ever thought that would be the gift she would give to me, after all of the ten dollar bills in a card, she would come through in the end with the best gift ever. . . permission to be who I was created to be. Even with her faults, without her "square" our family's quilt would be off somehow. There are gifts and lessons everywhere; I am thankful for each of them.